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Living a Simple Life: The Key to a Happier, More Fulfilling Lifestyle

In today's fast-paced world, it is easy to get caught up in the frenzy and lose sight of what really matters. We are constantly bombarded with messages about the latest gadgets, fashion trends and must-have products, all designed to make us feel like we need more. But what if the secret to a happier, more fulfilling life is actually having less?

This is the idea behind the simple lifestyle, a movement that is gaining popularity as more and more people seek to simplify their lives and focus on what is really important. In this article we will explore what the simple lifestyle is, why it has become so popular, and how you can incorporate it into your life.

What is Simple Living?

In the end, living simply means living with less. It is a lifestyle that prioritizes experiences over possessions and values quality over quantity. Living simply means being intentional in your choices and focusing on the things that really matter to you.

Simple living can take many forms, depending on individual values and goals. Some people choose to downsize their home and possessions, while others focus on reducing their carbon footprint by leading a more sustainable lifestyle. Still others prioritize time spent with family and friends over work or material activities.

Why is Simple Living Popular?

There are many reasons why simple living has become such a popular lifestyle choice in recent years. First, many people feel overwhelmed by the constant barrage of information and stimuli in our modern world. Simplifying one's life can be a way to cut through the noise and focus on what is really important.

In addition, many people are becoming more aware of the impact their choices have on the environment and future generations. Simple living can be a way to reduce the carbon footprint and live a more sustainable lifestyle.

Finally, many people are realizing that the pursuit of material goods and status symbols does not bring them the happiness and fulfillment they thought it would. Simple living can be a way to focus on the things that really matter, such as relationships, personal growth, and meaningful experiences.

Is simple living the same as minimalism?

Simple living and minimalism have some similarities, but they are not exactly the same thing.

Simple living is a lifestyle that emphasizes living with less, focusing on the essentials and avoiding excess. It is about finding satisfaction and joy in the simple pleasures of life, such as spending time with loved ones, being in nature, and pursuing personal interests. Simple living may involve reducing material possessions, but it does not necessarily focus on eliminating everything.

Minimalism, on the other hand, is a deliberate and intentional approach to the possession and accumulation of possessions. It consists of minimizing material possessions, retaining only those that are essential or have significant value. Minimalists often focus on decluttering and eliminating excess possessions to create more physical and mental space for what really matters in their lives.

Although simple living and minimalism share some principles, they differ in their focus and approach. Simple living is about a general approach to lifestyle, while minimalism is more specific to material goods.

How to incorporate the simple lifestyle into your life ?

If you are interested in incorporating the simple lifestyle into your life, there are some basic steps to take:

Define your values and goals. What is most important to you in life? What are your long-term goals? Defining these can help you make intentional choices about how you want to live.
Get your belongings in order. Look at your home and possessions and ask yourself what you really need. Getting rid of excess possessions can be a liberating experience and can help you focus on the things that really matter.
Simplify your schedule. Are you constantly busy and stressed? Simplifying your schedule can help you create more time for the things that are most important to you.
Focus on experiences rather than possessions. Instead of buying more things, focus on creating meaningful experiences with people you care about. This can mean taking a vacation, trying a new hobby, or simply spending time together.
Live a more sustainable lifestyle. Simple living often involves reducing your environmental impact. This can be done by reducing energy consumption, using public transportation or walking instead of driving, and choosing sustainable products.

Living a simple life can be an effective way to find happiness, fulfillment and meaning in today's fast-paced world. By prioritizing experiences over possessions, focusing on your values and goals, and living a more intentional and sustainable lifestyle, you can create a truly fulfilling and meaningful life.

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The Power of Minimalism: How Living with Less Can Improve Your Life

In today's world we are bombarded with messages telling us that more is better. We are encouraged to buy the latest gadgets, wear the trendiest clothes and accumulate as much stuff as possible. But what if the secret to a happier, more fulfilling life is actually having less stuff? This is the philosophy of minimalism, a growing movement that is gaining popularity around the world. In this article we will explore the benefits of minimalism and how you can incorporate it into your life.

What exactly is minimalism? In essence, minimalism is about living with intention and purpose. It is about identifying what is really important in your life and focusing your time, energy and resources on those things. This can manifest in different ways for different people, but the key is to eliminate excess and simplify your life.

One of the most obvious benefits of minimalism is that it can save you money. By choosing to live with less, you naturally spend less on material goods. This can free up money for experiences and activities that give you more joy and satisfaction.

But the benefits of minimalism go beyond just financial savings. Living with less can also reduce stress and anxiety. When we are surrounded by clutter and excess, this can be overwhelming and make it difficult to concentrate. Simplifying the environment can create a more peaceful and relaxing atmosphere.

Minimalism can also improve relationships. When you are not focused on accumulating objects, you have more time and energy to invest in the people around you. By prioritizing the quality of time spent with loved ones over material possessions, you can strengthen relationships and create deeper bonds.

Integrating minimalism into your life does not have to be an "all or nothing" approach. Start by decluttering your home and identifying items that you no longer need or use. Then, focus on buying only what you really need and will use regularly. Over time, you can continue to simplify your life and reap the benefits of a more intentional and purposeful lifestyle.

minimalist lifestyle

A minimalist lifestyle is a way of life that emphasizes simplicity and the elimination of excess possessions and distractions. It emphasizes the idea that happiness and fulfillment are not necessarily tied to material goods or consumerism and that by simplifying one's life, greater clarity, focus and satisfaction can be achieved.

Living a minimalist lifestyle can involve decluttering and minimizing material possessions, simplifying daily routines and habits, and reducing distractions such as social media and unnecessary commitments. It can also involve making more intentional choices about how to spend time and money, focusing on experiences rather than things, and prioritizing relationships and personal growth.

Many people find that a minimalist lifestyle can help them feel more satisfied and peaceful, as well as reduce stress and anxiety. It can also have benefits for the environment by reducing consumption and waste. However, it is important to note that minimalism is not a one-size-fits-all approach and may not be suitable or desirable for everyone.

minimalist living

Minimalist living is a lifestyle that emphasizes living with only essential possessions and reducing clutter and distractions to focus on what is really important. It is about simplifying one's life in terms of possessions, time and commitments.

In terms of possessions, minimalist living means owning only what is necessary and meaningful. This can involve decluttering and eliminating unnecessary items, as well as being mindful of future purchases and avoiding consumerism. By reducing possessions, minimalists aim to free up physical and mental space and focus on what really matters.

Regarding time and commitments, minimalist living involves an intentional choice of how to spend one's time and energy. This may involve prioritizing relationships, personal growth and experiences over material goods and unnecessary commitments. Minimalists aim to simplify their daily routines and habits to reduce stress and increase mindfulness.

Minimalist living can have many benefits, including reduced stress and anxiety, increased clarity and focus, and a stronger sense of purpose and meaning. However, it is important to note that minimalist living is not necessarily easy and requires discipline and commitment to maintain a minimalist lifestyle.

minimalist home

A minimalist home is a living space that emphasizes simplicity, functionality and clarity over over overdecoration or clutter. The use of natural light, neutral colors and simple shapes is emphasized to create a calm and peaceful environment.

In a minimalist home, the focus is on the essentials and the elimination of excess. This means that furniture, decor and other items are carefully chosen and kept to a minimum. Storage solutions are also carefully considered to keep clutter out of sight and maintain a clean and organized space.

Some common characteristics of a minimalist home are:

1. Open space: Minimalist homes often have an open layout that maximizes natural light and creates a feeling of spaciousness.
2. Neutral colors: Minimalist homes typically use neutral colors such as white, beige and gray to create a relaxing and cohesive environment.
3. Simple shapes: Furniture and furnishings in a minimalist home tend to have clean lines and simple shapes, with minimal decoration or ornamentation.
4. Natural materials: Minimalist homes often incorporate natural materials such as wood, stone and metal to create a connection to nature and a sense of authenticity.
5. Functional design: Each element of a minimalist home is chosen for its functionality and purpose, prioritizing quality over quantity.

A minimalist home can have many advantages, including a sense of calm and clarity, increased productivity, and easier maintenance. However, it is important to remember that minimalism is a personal choice, and what works for one person may not work for another.

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Budget-friendly lifestyle

10 simple strategies for a budget-conscious lifestyle

Living on a tight budget can be a challenging task, especially when trying to balance expenses and save money. However, with some simple strategies, it is possible to lead a fulfilling life without spending too much. In this article, we will explore ten effective ways to lead a budget-conscious lifestyle.

1. Plan meals and grocery shopping: One of the most effective ways to save money is to plan meals in advance and shop accordingly. Make a list of the ingredients you need for the week and stick to it to avoid impulse purchases.
2. Reduce meals out: Eating out can be expensive, so try to limit restaurant visits and cook at home. You can also try to prepare meals to save time and money.
3. Use coupons and discount codes: Look for coupons and discount codes online or in newspapers to save on things you need, such as groceries, clothing, and household items.
4. Buy used items: Instead of buying new, consider buying used items at thrift stores or online marketplaces. You can often find great deals on furniture, clothing, and electronics.
5. Reduce utility bills: Save money on your utility bills by turning off lights and electronics when you are not using them, turning down the thermostat in the winter, and using fans instead of air conditioning in the summer.
6. Creativity in entertainment: Entertainment does not have to be expensive. Look for free or low-cost activities in your community, such as visiting parks, museums or attending events.
7. Use public transportation or carpooling: Transportation costs can pile up quickly, so consider using public transportation or carpooling to save on gas and parking.
8. Do-it-yourself projects: Instead of hiring professionals for repairs or home improvements, try tackling them on your own with do-it-yourself projects. You can find tutorials and guides for a variety of projects online.
9. Reduce debt: Pay off high-interest debts first to save on interest payments and reduce your overall debt load. Consider consolidating debt into a lower-interest loan.
10. Set financial goals: Finally, set financial goals for yourself and track your progress. Whether it is saving for a house down payment or paying off a debt, having a goal in mind can help you stick to your budget and save money.

How can I live a good life on a budget?

Living well does not necessarily mean spending a lot of money. Here are some tips on how to live well on a budget:

1. Set priorities: Decide what is important to you and allocate your resources accordingly. For example, if travel is a priority, try to save money on flights and accommodations. If health is a priority, focus on inexpensive ways to maintain a healthy lifestyle, such as exercise, healthy eating and self-care.
2. Stick to a budget: Create a budget and stick to it. Keep track of expenses and adjust the budget as needed. Use free budgeting apps such as Mint or YNAB to help you stay on track.
3. Cook at home: Cooking at home is often cheaper and healthier than eating out. Plan your meals, make a shopping list and stick to it. Look for sales and coupons to save even more money.
4. Cut unnecessary expenses: Evaluate your spending and cut unnecessary ones. Cancel subscriptions you don't use, shop at thrift stores, and find free or low-cost activities to do in your free time.
5. Build an emergency fund: Set aside money for emergencies. Having a safety net can give you peace of mind and help you stay out of debt in case of unexpected expenses.
6. Practice gratitude: Appreciate what you have and focus on the positive aspects. Being grateful for what you have can help you feel happier and more satisfied with your life.
7. Surround yourself with positive people: Surround yourself with people who support and encourage you. Positive relationships can have a great impact on your overall well-being.

Remember that a good life does not depend on how much money you have, but rather on how you choose to live your life. By setting priorities, living within your means and focusing on the positives, you can live a fulfilling life on a limited budget.

What is the 50 20 30 rule for minimalist budgeting?

The 50/20/30 rule is a popular guideline for minimalist budgeting. The rule suggests dividing income into three main categories:

1. Needs - 50%: This category should account for 50% of your income and includes expenses necessary for your basic needs, such as housing, utilities, food, transportation and health care.
2. Savings and Debt Repayment - 20%: This category should account for 20% of your income and includes contributions to savings accounts, retirement plans, and debt payments such as credit cards or loans.
3. Wants - 30%: This category should account for 30% of your income and includes discretionary expenses such as entertainment, hobbies, travel and dining out.

The 50/20/30 rule is intended to help you prioritize your spending and ensure that you are meeting your basic needs, saving for the future and indulging in some discretionary spending. It is important to note that this rule is only a guideline and you may need to adjust the percentages based on your personal situation and financial goals.

In conclusion, living a budget-friendly lifestyle does not have to be complicated. By following these simple strategies, you can save money and still enjoy a fulfilling life. Remember to plan meals and grocery shopping, cut back on meals out, use coupons and discount codes, buy used items, reduce bills, get creative with entertainment, use public transportation or carpooling, tackle DIY projects, reduce debt, and set financial goals. By keeping these strategies in mind, you will be on your way to a more budget-friendly lifestyle in no time.

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Frugal living on a tight budget: tips and tricks

Frugal living has become an increasingly popular lifestyle choice in recent years. It involves making intentional spending and saving choices to achieve financial independence and freedom. In this post we will explore what frugal living is, why it is beneficial, and how to incorporate it into your daily life.

What is frugal living?

Frugal living is a lifestyle of being mindful of how you spend your money. It is not about being cheap or living in poverty, but rather about making intentional choices to save money and live a simpler, more sustainable lifestyle. Frugal living is about prioritizing what is truly important in life, such as experiences, relationships and personal growth, over material goods.

How do I start frugal living?

Frugal living is about being careful with your spending and making intentional choices to spend money only on essentials or things that bring value to your life. Here are some tips to get you started:

1. Set financial goals: Before you start frugal living, it is essential to determine what goals you want to achieve. Goals can be anything from saving for a house down payment to paying off debt.
2. Create a budget: Once you have established your financial goals, create a budget that outlines your income and expenses. This will help you identify areas where you can cut back and save.
3. Keep track of expenses: Keep track of every penny you spend for a month or two to get an idea of where your money is going. Use this information to adjust your budget and identify areas where you can cut back.
4. Avoid impulse purchases: Resist the temptation to buy on a whim. Make a list of the things you need and stick to it.
5. Use coupons and discount codes: Look for coupons and discount codes online or in newspapers to save on the things you need.
6. Cook at home: Eating out can be expensive, so try cooking at home. Plan meals in advance and buy groceries in bulk to save money.
7. Reduce your utility bills: Save on your utility bills by turning off lights and electronics when you are not using them, turning down the thermostat in winter, and using fans instead of air conditioning in summer.
8. Buy used items: Look carefully for used items instead of buying new. You can often find great deals on furniture, clothing and electronics at thrift stores or online marketplaces.
Remember that frugal living does not mean depriving ourselves of what we like, but rather being conscious of our spending and making intentional choices in line with our financial goals.

Benefits of a frugal lifestyle

There are many benefits to adopting a frugal lifestyle. First, a frugal lifestyle can help you achieve financial freedom. By living below your means and saving, you can pay off debts, create an emergency fund and eventually achieve financial independence.

Frugal living also promotes mindfulness and intentionality in all areas of life. When you are aware of how you spend money, you are more likely to make intentional choices in other aspects of life as well. A frugal life can help you focus on what is really important, such as relationships, hobbies, and personal growth.

Finally, a frugal life is more sustainable and environmentally friendly than a consumption-oriented lifestyle. By choosing to live a simpler life with fewer possessions, you can reduce your environmental impact and contribute to a more sustainable future.

Tips for frugal living

If you are interested in adopting a frugal lifestyle, here are some tips to get you started:

1. Set a budget: The first step to a frugal lifestyle is to set a budget and stick to it. Determine your monthly income and expenses and allocate your money accordingly.
2. Reduce unnecessary expenses: Try to reduce non-essential expenses. For example, consider canceling subscriptions or eating out less often.
3. Smart shopping: When you have to shop, be smart. Look for deals, coupons and sales and consider buying second-hand or refurbished items.
4. Embrace DIY: Instead of paying for goods and services, consider doing it yourself. For example, learn how to cook your own meals, fix things around the house, or make your own gifts.
5. Practice gratitude: Finally, practice gratitude for what you have. Focus on the things that really matter in life, such as relationships and experiences, rather than material possessions.

Conclusion

Frugal living is a lifestyle choice that can help you achieve financial freedom, promote mindfulness and intentionality, and contribute to a more sustainable future. By setting a budget, reducing unnecessary expenses, making smart purchases, embracing DIY and practicing gratitude, you can incorporate frugal living into your daily life and reap the benefits of a simpler, more intentional lifestyle.

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Healthy Meal Prep Ideas for Weight Loss: Tips and Recipes

Are you trying to lose a few extra pounds but struggling to find the time and motivation to cook healthy meals? Meal preparation may be the solution for you! Not only can it save you time and money, but it can also help you maintain a healthy diet and achieve your weight loss goals.

In this article we will share some ideas for preparing healthy meals for weight loss, along with tips to help you get started.

1. Plan ahead.

The key to successful meal preparation is planning. Before you start preparing, decide how many meals you want to prepare for the week and create a shopping list accordingly. You can also choose a day of the week on which to prepare meals and set aside a few hours to do so.

2. Choose the right foods

When it comes to preparing meals for weight loss, it is important to choose the right foods. Focus on incorporating lean proteins, whole grains, fruits and vegetables into your meals. Avoid processed foods, sugary snacks and high-fat foods.

3. Invest in quality containers

Invest in high-quality containers that are microwave and dishwasher safe. This will help keep your meals fresh and organized throughout the week.

4. Try these healthy meal prep ideas

Here are some healthy meal preparation ideas for weight loss that you can try:

Overnight oats with berries and almond milk for a quick and healthy breakfast.
Grilled chicken breast with roasted vegetables and quinoa for a protein-packed lunch.
Turkey chili with mixed beans and brown rice for a satiating and nutritious dinner
Greek yogurt with sliced fruit and granola for a healthy snack.

5. Mix it up

Eating the same meals every day can get boring fast. To avoid getting bored with meal preparation, vary! Experiment with different recipes, spices and sauces to keep things interesting.

In conclusion, meal preparation can be a game changer when it comes to achieving your weight loss goals. By planning ahead, choosing the right foods, investing in quality containers, and trying new recipes, you can maintain your healthy eating habits and keep your weight in shape.

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Toxic relationships: 5 alarm bells not to be overlooked

The 5-Alarm Warnings of a Toxic Relationship

You have only been together for a few days and already he has told you that he loves you. One day he lavishes you with compliments and the next he compares you to his ex. Today he wants to marry you and tomorrow he won't answer the phone. Are you sure you are not experiencing one of those toxic relationships we often hear about? Here are some signs to help you get to safety

Can someone be happy in a toxic relationship?
What does burning the candle at both ends mean in relationship?
What does it mean when a guy keeps comparing you to his ex?
Is a controlling relationship toxic?
What does it mean when someone tries to isolate you?
Why does my relationship feel like a roller coaster?

You've found the man who seems made just for you: he's caring, kind, he tells you right away that he's serious. A warning bell rings in your head, though: what if it's one of those toxic relationships you hear more and more about? He is too perfect, but sometimes he behaves strangely, and you feel restless. Often our instincts warn us, but we don't always know how to listen to our deepest feelings. Yet, if we did we could discover in time the signs that warn us that what we are venturing into is an unhealthy love. But what are these signs?

Can someone be happy in a toxic relationship?

There are several situations that make us realize that the one we are living in is a toxic relationship. Certainly, if we are hurting, if we feel unhappy, if we don't feel free to be ourselves, it means that something is wrong in the relationship. If he doesn't respect you, he doesn't appreciate you, he belittles you or belittles your words and feelings, if he makes you feel bad, tries to manipulate you and make you feel bad about anything, you are experiencing toxic love. It would be good to run away at once, although leaving him is not easy. In fact, we often fall victim to a kind of emotional addiction, which pushes us to seek justifications for his behaviors or to delude ourselves that we can change him or turn things around. That is why it is important to realize early on when a relationship is wrong, so that we can prevent instead of cure. Here are five alarm bells that signal we are experiencing toxic love.

What does burning the candle at both ends mean in relationship?

You've only known each other for a short time, yet he runs at lightning speed. You've only been together a few days and already he considers you the woman of his life. He shower you with gifts, flowers, sweet thoughts, little messages. After not even a week, he has already told you that he loves you. Not that love at first sight is not possible, far from it. But if he runs too fast, if he overwhelms you with his attention to the nth degree, you would do well to be a little on guard. Often toxic relationships begin with behavior that is a bit over the top, with a real love bombardment and a tendency to skip all the steps. So he sweeps you off your feet and then keeps you in his grasp. Real love, healthy love, does not run so fast, but is built over time, giving each other time to get to know each other. Be wary of someone who runs and tells you I love you right away: he may be a narcissist who just wants to manipulate you.

What does it mean when a guy keeps comparing you to his ex?

Until yesterday he was super sweet and showered you with gifts and compliments. Today, all of a sudden, he compares you to his ex. Obviously, she was better than you. He doesn't do it directly; he just throws in a few barbs here and there. One word now, one later. And, in the meantime, he insinuates within you the doubt that you are not his match. He makes you feel insecure, competing, trying to trigger your jealousy. If you react, and perhaps argue, he is likely to apologize. For a few days he goes back to being loving as in the beginning, then again he tells you that she was so perfect. Which is not good for you. Needless to say: it's one of those toxic relationships you've read about or heard about maybe on TV. Run away from it now.

Is a controlling relationship toxic?

Jealousy is one thing, control freakiness is another. If you feel perpetually watched, if he demands to know everything you do during the day, who you talk to, which colleague you go out to lunch with, who you exchange messages with on WhatsApp, he is not jealous: he is trying to control you. If he sends you dozens or hundreds of messages during the day full of questions about what you are doing, demands to video call you to make sure you are really with your friends, gets irritated if you don't answer his phone as soon as it rings, it's not an excess of attention: he wants to control you, then maybe manipulate you. It is a sign that you are struggling with toxic love. Save yourself.

What does it mean when someone tries to isolate you?

Spending every weekend together is nice, but never having the chance to hang out with your friends is toxic. If he tries to isolate you, tells you that the people you were dating before you met him don't like him, makes excuses to keep you away from your parents and your sisters or brothers, be on the lookout: it could be a sign that you're in one of those toxic relationships that scare your friends so much. It's one thing to want you all to himself and let you know how much he cares about your love, it's another to try to isolate you from the world so he can control and manipulate you. Stop him now.

Why does my relationship feel like a roller coaster?

You really don't get it: yesterday he was head over heels in love, every doesn't have time to go out with you. The next day it's all rosy and maybe he's talking to you about marriage, the next he doesn't even answer his phone. He's not confused, he's a narcissist trying to keep you on the edge so he can get chased and have all your attention. He makes you live on a roller coaster because he knows that by doing so, you will fall further and further into the net until you can't get out. Leave him, and maybe get help from your friends, family or an expert to get you out of this toxic love.

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The importance of apologizing: here are 8 ways to do it right

There is no more difficult thing than apologizing. It takes a lot of courage to admit one's mistakes and try to make things right. When we make up our minds, we don't always get it right. Here's how to choose the right words and what would be best to avoid

Why is it important to receive an apology?
When should you not apologize?
How do you offer an apology email?
What are the right words to apologize?
If it's not just your fault, do this
Is it an apology if you say if?
What does righting wrongs mean?
How do you apologize and be sincere?
How do you apologize without expecting forgiveness?

Apologizing is the way through which we smooth out conflicts, repair our mistakes, recover relationships. By apologizing we show others our character, we admit that we are imperfect. Good apologies build bridges, heal wounds. Yet only a few of us know how to do it well or have the courage to do it. In fact, apologizing is not easy. It is a courageous act because it means admitting one's mistakes, coming to terms with oneself, and seeking a remedy for the situation.

Why is it important to receive an apology?

A sincere apology can be difficult to make. We have a tendency to self-justify, to look for reasons to blame our actions on the other person. If we can convince ourselves of this, then in our minds we may feel that an apology is unnecessary. Or we may not care enough to apologize to fix a certain situation. We may even overestimate how difficult it will be to apologize, self-convince ourselves that it won't do any good. However, sincere apologies bring a number of benefits to both the giver and the receiver. They help to strengthen relationships and repair trust, to reduce stress. If you're ready for your "mea culpa" moment, here are eight ways to apologize for good.

When should you not apologize?

Apologies are better made late than early. Sometimes there is a temptation to apologize quickly; we want to close the incident right away and move on. This benefits the perpetrator but does not meet the needs of the victim. You cannot provide an effective apology until, and unless, the injured party believes you fully understand what you did wrong. If the apology comes first, it will not be seen as sincere.

How do you offer an apology email?

If you are dealing with a relatively small "offense," consider whether it is better to apologize by text message or in person. Emails often work well for more serious situations. If you really did wrong, there is nothing more powerful than a pen, a letter and a stamp. The important thing is not to apologize via social media-it could be humiliating for everyone involved. Another rule of thumb: when you apologize to someone, you need to give them an out. You don't want this person to feel trapped: don't block them in the middle of a hallway at work, don't lean out of the car window so that they are unable to get away. Choose the right place and the right time.

What are the right words to apologize?

Use the phrases "I'm sorry" or "I apologize." Saying "I feel bad about what happened" often translates into not apologizing. These are words that have the vague outlines of an apology, but don't actually get there. Also, saying that you regret something puts the focus on you and your emotions. Instead, the moment needs to be centered exactly on the feelings of the offended person.

If the fault is not only yours, do this.

It may happen that you ask yourself: why should I apologize if we are both at fault? In this case, it may be worth taking responsibility for what happened. Avoid the impulse to say, "I'm sorry I did it, but you did it too." The temptation to do so is normal, because we want to put our behavior in context and call attention to the fact that we too are hurt. But save those words for later.

Is it an apology if you say if?

When apologizing, always choose your words carefully. Avoid the conditional tense. Phrases like "I'm sorry if anyone was offended" are not good, because they suggest that perhaps there were no victims. "But" is also a misstep. Instead, it is essential to use "I" or "my." For example, you could say, "I'm sorry for my outburst," instead of "I'm sorry for the fight this morning." It may also be helpful to make use of adverbs such as "truly," "sincerely," "deeply," and "extremely," which intensify the apology.

What does righting wrongs mean?

One of the fundamental elements of an apology is to repair. Sometimes it will be possible to do this in a direct way: broke your favorite wine glass? Buy a new one. Spilled coffee on your dress? Pay for dry cleaning. If this is not feasible, consider more symbolic forms of repair. For example, if you hurt someone's feelings with a critical comment, make it clear that you realize you misspoke. Sometimes it might be worth promising to behave better in the future.

How do you apologize and be sincere?

It is important for the injured person to understand that your words come from the heart. Therefore, the apology should correspond to the seriousness of the offense. If you are apologizing for an infidelity and say, "Sorry about that, love," you will not sound very sincere. However, those words might be appropriate if you are ten minutes late for dinner. You should put yourself in the other person's shoes and communicate that you understand that what you did caused pain. It may be helpful to listen first and ask questions about your point of view so that you really understand what the other person is going through. Only then will you be able to offer a more authentic, victim-centered apology.

How do you apologize without expecting forgiveness?

An apology is a starting point. However, don't expect forgiveness right away. Especially if you've done it big. The offended person will often need time and space to heal, and it is important not to pressure them. It is useless to continue the conversation with phrases like, "What's wrong? I apologized: how long are you going to hold back?" Better to say, "I understand that this is not going to fix everything, and I want to keep doing everything I can to make things right. I hope that even if you are not ready to forgive me, you are open to working with me to move forward together."

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Breast cancer now treated without removing lymph nodes

the sinus cancer now is cured without cutting their lymph nodes

A great oncologist, Virgilio Sacchini, brings to Italy the revolutionary breakthrough in breast cancer treatment already used in the United States. Now many women with breast cancer will no longer have to have their lymph nodes removed. The story previewed in Donna Moderna

Well-known oncologist Virgilio Sacchini, who has returned from Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center in New York to the European Institute of Oncology in Milan as director of the senology program, exclusively tells us about the breast cancer news he is "importing" to Italy.

Are sentinel nodes always removed?

If the sentinel lymph node, i.e., the first one located on the lymphatic network from the breast to the armpit, is found to be attacked by the disease, in the U.S. it is not always removed along with the other lymph nodes. What happens in Italy? In our country, axillary emptying surgery, as it is called, is still common practice. "Twenty years ago, the discovery of the sentinel lymph node was a big breakthrough," says Dr. Sacchini. "But new studies have changed the international standard of treatment. So much so that the new approach is in the National Cancer Institute guidelines. And, as of mid-May 2016, the new sentinel lymph node treatment is also in the treatment plans of the Ieo, first in Italy."

In practice, if there are fewer than three positive lymph nodes, they are not removed. Because therapies after surgery clean out any remaining cancer cells. "This prevents the woman from swelling of the arm, so-called lymphedema, and problems such as decreased sensation and limitations of movement in the operated arm," says the expert.

What is the new liquid biopsy test?

A clinical trial to assess tumor Dna in the blood is starting soon. This test is also already being performed in the United States. "We know that the tumor leaves traces of its presence in the blood," Dr. Sacchini continues. "They are Dna crumbs: by assaying them, we follow the tumor's reaction as we go through treatment. And, thanks to increasingly targeted drugs, we can block any mutations in it, with the goal of destroying the cancer."

What does integrated mean in medicine?

Spottily, integrated oncology outpatient clinics are also springing up in Italy, where doctors with expertise in various complementary medicines such as acupuncture, phytotherapy and homeopathy work alongside oncologists to alleviate the negative effects of cancer treatments and improve the quality of life of patients. "Every hospital should have a dedicated space," Dr. Sacchini concludes. "At the Ieo it is lacking, but the project has already taken off. The goal is to import the American model, with a team of physicians trained in the subject and medical records shared with oncologists."

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The new "social family" according to Facebook

Isocial have changed the way we communicate even within families. For example, they keep moms and older children in touch. Research takes a snapshot of our habits

Who said that cell phones and especially social media cannot become valuable tools for families? Often at the center of controversy about whether they should be used by children and adolescents, social networks can instead prove to be excellent allies in keeping the family together and allowing for greater communication between mom and children. This is said by the results of research conducted by Doxa on behalf of Facebook, which offers new food for thought: 9 out of 10 moms use precisely the blue social network to keep in touch with friends and family members (97 percent). Uninterested in showing off on message boards, posting personal and daily life stories (44% vs. 50% of dads), women with children show that they know how to use the network and social as an opportunity to have fun (94%) by viewing videos or to cultivate their interests by joining and following dedicated groups or pages (91%). But in their relationship with their children? Is it true that Italian moms also use the Net to "keep them in check" even when they are older?

How social media affects parent and child relationship?

According to the study (conducted on a sample of 500 parents over 50 and the same number of children over 25), social media and Facebook in particular are increasingly a ground for sharing rather than isolation between mothers and children. The first opportunity is offered at the time of the parent's enrollment in the platform, when in 53% of cases the roles are reversed and children find themselves teaching mothers how to move in the world of social. In this the difference from fathers is marked, because men seem to be more familiar with social and share less of its "tricks" with their children (29%). Once they join the Facebook world, then, mothers show that they use social as a tool to stay in touch with their children, following their activities even when they are away or away from home (72%). They often take an interest in their activities (43 percent) and even go so far as to comment on photos (63 percent) or share their posts (57 percent). Moms 3.0 then show no shame in posting shots of themselves with their "little ones." "I think there are positive aspects to social communication in the family, because there is a chance to get to know your children a little bit more, to know who they hang out with, who they hang out with, or to understand what they think. Criticism of social media doesn't make a lot of sense, partly because they are there now, so it's better to learn how to use them, even us parents, and how to manage them," explains Nan Cooseman, Family Coach and creator of Younite. "The important thing," warns the family relations expert, "is not to get into competition with your children. Sometimes it happens that moms show off more on social media, and then a form of race to see who appears more can be triggered."

"The fact that the research is conducted on a sample of children who are no longer young makes it possible to exclude a desire for real control on the part of parents. It should be considered, however, that many children, even adults or young adults, still live at home, and perhaps the social media used by family members in this represent a way to maintain communication that otherwise becomes rarefied. The only risk is that of breaking the intimacy of children, invading it," comments sociologist Chiara Saraceno.

Which is the best alternative to WhatsApp?

Social and especially those that focus on messaging have now supplanted the "old" phone calls. To communicate between family members, social tools such as Whatsapp, which is used for almost all contacts between mothers and children (98%), are now preferred. Also increasingly popular are voice messages, which are faster and more convenient (for those who record and send them, less so for those who receive them) than written text messages (81 percent). But since Whatsapp also allows the exchange of photos, that's when selfies and snaps also find a place in family communication, which thus changes form: "Social networks like Whatsapp represent a facilitation in family communication, especially when children are far away or away from home. I was in the U.S. for a year when I was 16 and was writing a letter a month to my parents. Already my daughters, also away from home for a long time, used email, with less formal, shorter but much more frequent messages. Today with Whatsapp one can send messages to each other potentially every day and several times a day, and one has the impression of being in continuous contact and the idea that, if needed, contact is possible and immediate. Whatsapp can also serve just to convey a state of mind from the child to the mother, and that's good," the sociologist explains.

"I think there needs to be a proper balance on the part of both children and parents in the use of Whatsapp. This way of communication can be very helpful when sometimes it happens that children shut down. If we parents ask them how they are doing or what they have, we probably hear a simple 'Nothing' answer. If, on the other hand, we send them a message via Whatsapp, perhaps writing 'Hi, I love you' or 'You're great,' we definitely please them, we let them know that we are close to them, but without invading their space, we make them feel that we are close to them. I personally am in love with gifts, animated icons, and I often communicate through these: this makes them laugh and makes me laugh, creating communication, although it is important to remember that there must be moments of sharing at home as well," Coosemans explains.

The family has now become so social that even phone calls have often become video calls or chats between members of the same household (in 50 percent of cases). "In fact, phone calls have simply been enhanced. If one's child is far away and becomes a father, video calls allow, for example, the grandmother to see the child eating a meal or playing, they are phone calls that allow greater participation, almost comparable to a visit, even if one cannot touch," explains sociologist Chiara Saraceno.

How do I make Instagram more family friendly?

In a society in which images are increasingly important, even family communication spaces have been "colonized" by photos, so much so that even a social site such as Instagram is now the preserve of modern moms, who often use it mainly to look at other people's (75 percent) and especially their children's (61 percent) shots. But is it really about sharing or a new form of remote control? Some speak of "affectionate control": "It is indeed a break in the space of privateness, evidently agreed upon, because the children accept it otherwise they would not allow their mother to be among their contacts. The important thing is that the parents do not think they are equal friends, because that is not their role. I don't think, however, that the confidence between mother and children increases if they see each other or share photos on social media, also because I don't think anyone is ever an open book to someone else," says the sociologist. "Of course feeling watched and controlled doesn't make children very happy. I have to say that I learn a lot from Instagram and especially from Stories. I guard against commenting, but I see who my children are with, how they communicate, and I do it from a distance, without being intrusive. Sometimes it happens that children block parents, but it's all about how you use social," concludes Family Coach Nan Coosemans.

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We moms, forced to quit our jobs

In the past year more than 37,000 women have resigned after the birth of a child. And, surprisingly, many live in the North. The reasons? Daycare centers are lacking, grandparents are far away, husbands earn more. "We just have to choose between profession and family."

"When I handed my resignation letter to my boss, I saw years of sacrifices gone up in smoke: college paid for by being a waitress, nights in books, internships, anxiety about the job interview, and the first, exciting, rewards in the office. All dissolved in an instant: I felt like a loser." Marika, a 37-year-old from Naples, is one of 37,611 women (compared to 13,947 men) who in 2019 said goodbye to salary, contributions, and, why not, career opportunities. An army, peaceful but disappointed, the size of a medium-sized city like Nuoro. The numbers come from the Labor Inspectorate's new report, which takes a snapshot of the phenomenon each year and highlights the increase in 2019 compared to 2018.

What gives pause for thought is the motivation for all these resignations: the difficulty of reconciling private life and employment when a child is born. But who are these women? How old are they and where do they live? Is there no way to prevent them from being forced to choose between family and work?

What does it mean to make ends meet?

By 2018, 35,963 women had left their posts. While, 1 year later, the increase does not seem huge, the absolute figure leaves one speechless when looking at the 17,175 in 2011. "And to say that in January 2020 we celebrated the Istat data on women's employment, with 35,000 more jobs than in October 2019," notes Barbara Poggio, labor sociologist and pro-rector for Equity and Diversity Policies at the University of Trento. "It means we find a contract, we win promotions, but then we have to throw in the towel when we become mothers. This phenomenon is not new, but it is taking on worrying dimensions. Also because, in 60 percent of cases, resignations are given after the birth of the first child; before, we quit at the second child, when things were actually more difficult to make ends meet, now we are forced to quit right away."

Those who quit their jobs are, on average, between 34 and 44 years old, have low professional seniority and live in the North. In fact, leading the unflattering ranking, with 11,105 resignations, are Lombard moms. "There is also a numerical reason: in the North there are more working women, with the employment rate averaging 60 percent, in line with Europe," Professor Poggio points out, "while in the South only one in 3 women has a contract. Indeed, here girls are often forced to leave to build a future, only to find themselves without the help of their grandparents or family network once they move to another city.

As happened to Marika. "I came to Milan to study: a "safe" degree in economics, then a position in an auditing firm. I was satisfied and it seemed natural to fulfill my other dream: to have a child," she says as 2-year-old Pietro takes his afternoon nap. "Everything fell apart when he didn't get into the municipal daycare and we fell back on a nanny. In fact, on multiple nannies who periodically abandoned us. Exhausted, we turned to a nanny recruitment agency: they were perfect, too bad they had golden pay. We held out for 1 year, hoping they would accept Peter at the private daycare. Which, however, has since closed. So my husband and I found ourselves one evening, calculator in hand, trying to reconcile the accounts that no longer added up. His salary is higher than mine, so for now I put aside work. And myself."

Why do job applications ask if you are over 40?

The gender pay gap is one reason for the resignation of new mothers. According to Eige, the European Institute for Gender Equality, the difference in average monthly income between men and women in Italy is 18 percent. "What is needed now is a really truthful mapping of this gap and an effective law that forces companies to close it," comments Barbara Poggio. "Not least because in the coming months, due to the pandemic-related crisis, female employment is likely to lose out even more. Istat data for April have already shown a 2.9 percent drop. Service sectors, for example, tourism and stores, where so many women work, will be penalized. And what will happen if schools close again due to a resurgence of infections? The family burden will fall on mothers and the number of resignations will probably go up."

The other major obstacle is the lack of services. In larger cities, kindergartens remain a mirage, as do toy libraries or subsidized price initiatives. Serena, a 41-year-old factory worker from Rome, had become a kind of Sherlock Holmes on the hunt for the best ones. "With the first child, who is now 7 years old, a miraculous nesting and grandmothering saved us. Then, after the birth of the second, my mom got sick. I tried everything: leave of absence, help from friends, nannies on call. Meanwhile, the big one grew and the workload increased. The blanket was always too short and I was in danger of choking on it. I asked for part-time, but the company refused me. It was actually the classic straw that broke the camel's back: for months I had been feeling on the sidelines, my manager blaming me for absences related to my "being a mom" in front of everyone. Now I'm on the bench and I'm afraid I'll be there for a long time: who wants an over-40 woman asking for flexible employment?"

Part-time often proves to be a boomerang for career and retirement. Smart working can be a solution, but clear rules are needed

"The old part-time is a dangerous tool, because it has been shown to prevent career advancement and, in a system like ours based on contributions, it also becomes a boomerang for retirement purposes," Professor Poggio points out.

What about the smart working that is so much talked about? "We need to really intervene on flexibility: institutions and unions must make it a reality even after the emergency has passed, taking advantage of the particular historical period that can act as a driving force," notes Poggio. "Clear rules must be put in black and white for the various categories. Parental leave must also be improved, and not just by increasing the days. Because of the Covid crisis, there is now an allowance of 50 percent of daily pay, but it is usually 30 percent: using them is not very convenient. This is a country where there is a lot of talk about family, but little is done: there is no more time to waste."

Also for the good of the Italian economy: it is proven that if female employment increases, GDP increases.

What is understanding numbers?

73% cases in which leaving employment after the birth of children is the mother

9 out of 10 resigning women who are blue-collar or white-collar workers, mainly in the service sector

21% of part-time requests that are granted

33,442 new mothers resigned in northern Italy in 2019

15,505 resignations motivated by "lack of support"

(Source: Labor Inspectorate, 2019 Report)

What is the Better for Families Act?

The approval process in Parliament of the Family Act, the bill wanted by Equal Opportunities and Family Minister Elena Bonetti (who assures that the measures will be reality by the end of the year), began on July 16. Awaiting the implementation decrees expected in the fall, here are some of the planned measures.

The universal child allowance: it will be paid monthly from the seventh month of pregnancy to the 18th birthday of each child. It will have a minimum amount for all households, to which a variable amount will be added depending on Isee.
Subsidies for daycare and nursery fees also up to 100 percent.
The extension of mandatory paternity leave (from 7 to 10 days), regardless of marital and family status.
A supplementary allowance on salary, provided by Inps, for female workers returning after compulsory maternity leave.

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The 10 skills most in demand at work: the study

The 10 most in-demand skills at work: the study2023 has been designated as the "European Year of Skills." But what are the ones most in demand in the world of work? Here are the ten qualities that cannot be missing from a resume

What did Ursula von der Leyen study?
What skills are you continuing to work on?
What percent of Italy is educated?
Skills most in demand at work: leadership skills
What are the benefits of long distance communication?
What skills are relevant to data analysis?
What is knowledge of customer relationship management?
What skills do I need as a content creator?
Can you speak English how to answer?
What can you do with programming languages?
What skills are needed for green transition?
How do you manage personnel?

What skills are most in demand in the workplace? The question is a legitimate one, since every day we hear that companies in Italy have difficulty hiring because they cannot find workers with the right skills. In reality, this is not just an Italian problem: according to a study by the European Commission, 77 percent of European companies have difficulty hiring candidates with the right skills. This is also why 2023 has been declared the "European Year of Skills." The aim is to promote the trend toward retraining and updating knowledge, especially in small and medium-sized companies.

What did Ursula von der Leyen study?

"We need to invest much more in training and skills development. We need to do this by working hand in hand with businesses. No one knows the job profiles they need better than they do. We need to better match these needs with the goals and aspirations of job seekers. But we also want to attract to our continent the skills needed to help businesses and strengthen Europe's growth," explained European Commission President Ursula von der Leyen.

What skills are you continuing to work on?

The European Commission's website explains that the European Year of Skills will give new impetus to achieving the EU's 2030 social goals, which call for at least 60 percent of adults to be involved in training and for at least 78 percent of the adult population to be employed. At the top of the agenda are issues related to digital transformation and environmental transition. But these are not the only skills that companies are paying attention to. There are also communication and problem-solving skills and an aptitude for teamwork and continuing education throughout one's working life. An inclination, the latter, that is by no means taken for granted. According to the latest Eurostat report, among employed Europeans who continue to train, 19.6 percent are young people between the ages of 20 and 24; 14.9 percent are workers between the ages of 25 and 29; and 10.8 percent are between the ages of 30 and 34.

What percent of Italy is educated?

Regarding, however, the countries most active in retraining their workers, at the top are Sweden, Finland and the Netherlands. Italy is only in 15th place: here, only 9.9 percent of the population between 25 and 64 years old consistently participates in training and professional qualification courses. But what are the skills that companies demand and that are increasingly needed in the world of work? This question was answered by professionals from Icotea University Institute, who identified ten. One is adeptness at continuing education. Here are all the others.

Skills most in demand at work: leadership skills

In a rapidly changing marketplace, among the most in-demand skills are leadership and management aptitude. These are essential skills to inspire work teams and help employees cope with ever-faster market changes, and perhaps thrive because of them. It is, arguably, the one human skill that Artificial Intelligence can never replace.

What are the benefits of long distance communication?

Communication and teamwork skills have always been valued by companies. After the pandemic and virtually blanket spread of remote work, however, communication has become increasingly important. Workers must be able to communicate clearly both in person and through a variety of different channels, such as: e-mail, instant messaging, video, and project management software.

What skills are relevant to data analysis?

Data is the new corporate gold. Every day, thanks to technology, businesses come into possession of a flood of information. It goes without saying that among the most in-demand skills is the ability to know how to manage data, that is, collect, store and use it safely, efficiently and economically. But, above all, it is important to know how to analyze data, since through analysis we obtain useful information for making informed decisions. Effective data analysis can help organizations optimize performance and reduce costs.

What is knowledge of customer relationship management?

Among the most in-demand skills in the business world is the ability to manage customer relationships. It is important for companies not to lose existing customers but to increase their loyalty. Reason: it is less expensive to keep a customer than to find a new one.

What skills do I need as a content creator?

By now, no company can do without social media. But, being on social platforms also means knowing how to tell a story, creating a narrative consistent with one's values, and retaining followers with increasingly engaging and engaging content. This kind of activity requires people with skills related to creativity, originality, social perceptiveness and emotional intelligence.

Can you speak English how to answer?

If you don't know English, you're not going anywhere now. Yet, only 19.7 percent of Italians speak it fluently. Too bad that as companies internationalize, the need for people who speak this language, or who are willing to train in it, increases more and more.

What can you do with programming languages?

The pandemic has caused us all to move to the Internet. This has accelerated the digital transformation. Software development skills are increasingly needed today. Among the most in-demand skills in 2023 is knowledge of different programming languages, such as Python, Java, and JavaScript.

What skills are needed for green transition?

We live in the age of climate change. National and supranational governments are all pushing for a reduction in polluting emissions and a more sustainable world. Workers who can secure infrastructure with a view to lowering carbon dioxide and pollutant emissions will be increasingly essential in the coming years.

How do you manage personnel?

New technologies and artificial intelligence have many advantages, but also several disadvantages. One among them is the reduction of jobs to the benefit of automated systems. But because of this, workers who can manage staff in a way that maximizes employee productivity by interpreting and responding to their individual needs will be even more necessary.

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5 things we can do if our partner doesn't listen to us

Why don't we feel heard by our beloved? Are we really good at letting them know how we feel? Communication in a couple's relationship is the foundation. Here's what to do if our partner doesn't listen to us

Speak freely
What do you mean by never take anything for granted?
How can I be a good interlocutor?
What does it mean when your partner doesn't listen to you?
How do you work on self-esteem?

Is there anything better than being loved, understood and accepted for who you are? No, love is the best thing. Within the couple, the desire to feel heard and respected is a given. Without the feeling of being able to express freely, solid love cannot be built. If these prerequisites are missing, it is difficult to let go. But what to do if the partner does not listen?

Communicating freely and exposing desires and feelings is the basis of any relationship. Perhaps listening and understanding the other person is precisely the most important thing for lasting love. The only convenient way to get to know each other, and to be known, is to open to dialogue, to confront each other, to listen. Learning to love each other requires communication.

Speak freely

We often think we are being crystal clear -- but we are not. There are many reasons why communicating is difficult: fear of the other person's reaction, struggling to find words, shyness. One should not let oneself get stuck though. It happens sometimes to feel guilty or not legitimized to express one's thoughts.

This should never happen, in front of your partner you should always feel accepted, let go, try. Your reaction will be a test after all. If the way the other person responds intimidates you, perhaps you should reevaluate the person in front of you.

What do you mean by never take anything for granted?

The second piece of advice we want to give you is to never take anything for granted when expressing a desire or discomfort. Everyone's perception and thinking is so unique that each of us works with different thought patterns. A thousand different implications can be deduced from a single sentence, depending on your point of view. So do not leave unsaid, do not assume that the other person understands the importance that certain words have for you, always explain everything.

It may sound trivial, but subjective and personal experiences weigh differently on everyone's experience. Your partner has not experienced all the feelings, traumas and milestones that you have accrued, so try to offer him or her your point of view in a clear manner.

How can I be a good interlocutor?

Sometimes we stop on our positions because we feel attacked, misunderstood and judged. But are we really listening to the other person? When anger and frustration take over, it is easy to lose sight of objectivity and defend one's reasons rather than confronting each other in a sincere and open way. Listening to the needs of the loved one can also help us understand how to deal with the issue assertively.

Sometimes putting pride aside and trying to understand the partner's reasons may be the only way. The feeling of not being heard by the better half is really distressing. The very person who should most support us walls us up, this of course generates suffering. But do not fall into the trap of desiring listening in a one-sided way, putting your partner's needs aside.

What does it mean when your partner doesn't listen to you?

There is no easy solution to this question. If the person in front of you doesn't listen, doesn't understand, doesn't spend time with you, you must first of all understand the reason for his or her behavior. He may simply be the wrong person, as he does not share interests and sensitivities with you. In such cases it is good to evaluate the whole relationship. In case your partner does not listen to you, does not believe you, or even ridicules what you say. The only way is to end the relationship before irreparably undermining your self-esteem.

Perhaps it may be a difficult time for your loved one instead. Or the issues you are bringing into the couple are too great and your partner does not have the tools to help you. In that case, couples therapy may be the solution. Going through a psychological journey together, followed by a therapist, will make you understand each other better, intensifying the relationship and your intimacy.

How do you work on self-esteem?

It may seem like obvious advice, but increasing your self-esteem and feeling good about yourself is the only way to make a relationship work. When you have sufficient self-esteem you feel less under judgment, less exposed to each other, and this helps you communicate better with your partner.

The concept of self-esteem is related to that of assertiveness. In fact, being assertive means being able to communicate without too many mental reservations, without being harnessed by feelings of inferiority or even narcissistically pleasing oneself and experiencing the relationship with others in a hostile way. Working on self-esteem will help you in every aspect of your life, from love, to friendships, but also in work and in your relationship with yourself.

There is no easy decalogue of what to do if your partner does not listen, but you should always work on the specific case, investigating the reasons for the behavior and the dynamics of the couple. Improving communication is always a good exercise for a lasting and happy love relationship.

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What is triggered in your brain when you fall in love?

You meet the right person and the healthiest chemical storm ever is unleashed in the brain. A wave of well-being and energy that makes you look at the world with optimistic eyes.

What does falling in love do to your mind?

Those who have been there know: in the initial stage of falling in love, one lives in another dimension. It is as if the heart and mind are muffled, isolated from the rest of the world.

"There is a feeling of 'empty head,' one is constantly thinking about him or her. And the desire to always be together prevails over any commitment, " says Professor Fabrizio Quattrini, psychosexologist, president of the Italian Institute of Scientific Sexology in Rome and professor at the Faculty of Psychology at the University of L'Aquila.

In those days and months of strong heartbeat, one sees reality with different eyes. All the fault, indeed merit, of the chemical storm that happens to the body. "People in love are more helpful, they look at life more positively, they feel more energetic, " the professor continues. But unknowingly they deceive and mislead themselves. "That's right: they avoid as much as possible to see in the other the things that are wrong and to reveal their own flaws."

Read also: What happens to your body when you fall in love

It is mostly men who paint themselves as different from reality. According to research by psychologist Bella DePaulo of the University of Virginia, who has studied the pattern of little lies when in love, males tend to pass themselves off as better than they are. Women, on the other hand, lie mostly to make their partners feel better. "Having one's eyes 'lined' by this kind of love blindness prompts one to do totally new things, almost as if one changes character.

A rather cold man can become sweeter, an unempathetic woman can turn into a very good listener," Quattrini says. As with all "drugs," we repeat, the effects of falling in love are destined to wear off: "When, after a year at most, hormone levels return to what they used to be, the intoxication comes to an end.

How is true love formed?

At this point the authentic knowledge of the other person begins, which can finally turn into true love," Professor Quattrini continues. "It is at this moment, however, that the first major crisis can arise because one sees the partner as he or she really is. In short, falling in love is like a good hors d'oeuvre: you taste it, stimulate your senses, marvel at its goodness and begin to fantasize about the wonders of the next courses. And when the bill comes at the end of the emotional meal, you come back to reality. And there you decide whether to continue together."

What is the purpose of meeting minutes?

The first look is the starting point for what will be a truly magnificent obsession. The thought of him or her becomes installed in the mind. And here begins the projection of our dreams: we are already certain that the other or the other is perfect and suitable for us.

After 5 months, passion is at its peak: you are strong and fearless

Time begins to pass too quickly in the company of our partner and is not shared with others. We feel more full of mental energy, every problem becomes smaller and more manageable, we are not afraid of anything.

After one year: love is born

This is the most delicate moment; the couple is ready to move on to the next stage: love. However, some people confuse the end of the euphoria with the end of the feeling. But this is not necessarily the case.

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What is an example of emotional blackmail in a relationship?

How to overcome emotional blackmail in a relationship and be reborn

In life it can happen to run into manipulative people who resort to emotional blackmail to get what they want. Here is how these dynamics work in romantic relationships and how to get out of them

What is an example of emotional blackmail?
What are examples of emotional blackmail?
What to do if you are a victim of blackmail?
What personality disorder is emotional blackmail?

What is an example of emotional blackmail?

Emotional blackmails are very dysfunctional dynamics that occur in some relationships. They are a form of manipulation, including through threats, that a person uses to make demands and get what they want.

Emotional blackmail generally occurs in romantic or otherwise intimate (parent-child) relationships and, just as in "normal" blackmail, the underlying message is "If you don't do what I want and when I want it, you will regret it. I will make you suffer."

Those who practice emotional blackmail aim to leverage the victim's guilt, fear and anger to get what they want. It also triggers a de-responsibility mechanism: if something bad/wrong happens, it is not their fault, but the victim's.

What are examples of emotional blackmail?

A person who is an emotional blackmailer tends to be emotionally immature. He does not know how to build or maintain a healthy relationship, but relies on his negative behavior to persuade the other person to comply with his wishes.

When someone practices emotional blackmail, it leads the victim to feel guilty because he has shifted the responsibility for his actions onto the victim.

Among the strategies of emotional blackmail is the confusion aroused in the victims. The perpetrator manages to make his demands seem reasonable, making the victim look and feel selfish or crazy.

These phrases are examples of emotional blackmail:

I betrayed you because you neglected me.
If you leave me, I will kill myself.
If you really loved me as you say, you would stop doing such a thing because I want you to.
I have talked to my friends and family, and they all agree that you are crazy!
You ruined my life and now you're trying to tell me to stop drinking?
It's your fault I didn't get that promotion at work.
If you only bought healthy food, I wouldn't be fat.

What to do if you are a victim of blackmail?

Although it sounds strange, it is not so easy to realize that one is the victim of moral blackmail (from one's partner or from an affection very close to us). In fact, you are often too far into the situation to have a clear view of it and to understand the "warning" signs. However, if you have the doubt, try paying attention to these details: if you answer "yes" to at least one of these questions, then it is likely that you are experiencing emotional blackmail.

Do you apologize a lot? In other words, do you feel as if your partner thinks everything you do is wrong and, therefore, you constantly feel obligated to ask for forgiveness?
Do you take responsibility for your partner's actions? In other words, if he is arguing on a whim, do you automatically think it is because you did something wrong?
Do you feel like you are the only one who gives up or makes sacrifices in the relationship?
Do you often feel intimidated by your partner? Do you feel like you obey his demands because you feel threatened or otherwise forced?
Have you made/do you make changes in your life just to make your partner happy?
Do you find it difficult to stand up for yourself? Or do you feel like you walk on eggshells often, knowing that you can't talk about some (many) things and knowing that you can't talk about things that bother you?
Do you find it impossible to set boundaries in your relationship or to say no to your partner?
Do you find it extremely difficult to communicate with your partner? Do you think that if you try, he will not listen to what you are really saying?

What personality disorder is emotional blackmail?

If you find that you are the victim of emotional blackmail in your relationship, you need to realize that you deserve better. In the meantime, try to manage the situation by following these tips.

Be honest with yourself. First, you need to be honest with yourself and take a lucid and objective look at your partner's behavior. Try to recognize his controlling behavior, of all kinds.
Keep a journal. Jot down your daily interactions with your partner. This will allow you to go back and review what was said and done by both of you. In this way, you have a written record of the actual behavior that is happening. Since memory can sometimes play tricks on us, it is important to put the facts on paper, partly so that you can better analyze them later.
Seek help. Try to understand why you allow this behavior from your partner. Is there something in your past that makes you think you deserve this negative behavior? If you have the resources to do so, seek help from a therapist to help you find out why you allow others to emotionally blackmail you.
Act for yourself. It is important to understand the seriousness of the situation, including the type of relationship with the emotional blackmailer. If it is occasional behavior, talk to your partner and try to convince him to seek help. If the situation is too compromised or he refuses, consider ending the relationship.

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