5 little things that could harm your children
Which things can be harmful for kids?
When it comes to your children, are you always apprehensive? Being a mom is by no means easy, but beware of some behaviors: even small gestures could harm your children
- Answering questions
- Hiring a tutor could harm children
- Homework time
- Harm your children? Watch out for excessive caring
- School stress: what to do
That being a parent is the most difficult job is now well established. One always wants to do the best for one's children, but running into some mistakes is inevitable. As always, experience is the best teacher. It takes time and patience, but for moms it is not always easy. A baby is not only joy: there is no shortage of thoughts and worries, doubts and fears. When a baby is born, the woman also discovers herself as a mother for the first time, and everything is new to her: needs, routines, attention. Everything changes and everything is experienced for the first time. Sometimes it happens that we make mistakes with our children, and we should not blame ourselves: watch out, however, for 5 small gestures that can harm your children.
Answering questions
What you have always believed to be right about eduction may instead turn out to be counterproductive. Small, seemingly obvious gestures may on the contrary be unhelpful for your children. For example, is it really true that you always have to satisfy your child's curiosity? Little ones often go wild with countless questions. With them it is a succession of "how, what and why." And you are always on the alert, ready to carefully choose the simplest and most appropriate words to make sense of their doubts. But is that really what you need to do?
Don't go crazy hoping to find the best answer: resist the temptation and return the question to the sender, stimulating his or her problem solving skills. If necessary, compliment him on the observation made and, above all, ask him what his thoughts are on that particular topic. What does he think about it? What is his hypothesis and why did he come to a certain conclusion? This is the right opportunity to stimulate your child's mind, helping him to reason. This is how you will help little ones think. Teach them how to look for evidence and how to test their ideas, while understanding that failing is not a mistake. If your child needs support, guide them through the process.
Hiring a tutor could harm children
How many moms think they need to pair a tutor with their children? If it is not really necessary, you can do without it. The risk is that your child will lose confidence in himself. Teach him, on the contrary, to become independent. Failure is part of life and not something to be ashamed of. Not always getting high grades in school, for example, is not dishonorable. Your child may lose confidence and implicitly receive a very troubling message, "I don't believe in you." Clearly, moms act with the best of intentions in order to help their children, but sometimes moderation is needed. Do you really believe that your child cannot cope on his own?
It happens that the nagging presence of a tutor can harm children, preventing them from learning valuable life skills, from organizing their own routine to time management to autonomy and responsibility. Younger children may not believe in themselves and their abilities, but also experience little satisfaction when faced with a job well done. "After all, I didn't do it myself." And so, if you really want to do good toward your child, show willingness to support him if he asks you for extra help. In that case, the presence of a tutor could be important. But give him time: "I'll let you work on your own first, because I know you can do it."
Homework time
If placing your child side by side with a private teacher is likely to cause him to lose confidence and self-assurance, a mom (or dad) should also avoid standing next to him when he is doing homework. In fact, the constant presence of parents may prove to be of little use. If the child needs confrontation, it is okay to be there and help him. But let him do it himself first. Not only that: support his passions and stimulate him with questions and activities. There are many interactive ways to do this. You can ask your child what he is learning in school, what his favorite subject is, and how he gets along with the teachers. Look for games, books, sports or museum visits to indulge his passions and encourage learning.
Harming your children? Beware of excessive care
Are you always careful that your child does not run into any danger? Do you never let him out of your sight and always have a watchful eye on him? Are you afraid that he might get hurt at any moment? It's time for a change. At the park you recommend that he not pick up a branch from the ground, when he is playing you urge him not to run, and at every opportunity you recommend that you pay attention. If there is really no danger nearby, for example a road that your child might suddenly cross, there is no need to nag him. Caring about your children is essential, but don't go overboard with your caring spirit. Childhood injuries are beneficial for the growth and mental health of young children. If you want to prevent your children from suffering from anxiety problems or experiencing separation from their parents badly, let them experiment freely. Exploration, even individual exploration, is important.
Certain injuries done as children help them gain confidence in themselves, know their limits, and have body awareness, preventing them from getting hurt again in the future. Not only that, if you give your child the right spaces, you will avoid creating a symbiotic and dependent relationship. You will help him to be autonomous and to stand up when he is alone. Remember that your child will grow up and cannot always be dependent on you.
School stress: what to do
If your child is sick, leave him or her home from school. It is essential so that he gets well as soon as possible and avoids infecting his classmates as well. Sometimes, however, illness is not the only reason why absence from the classroom might be justified. If you are presented with an extracurricular learning opportunity, why pass it up? A trip to discover a city, with its history, art, museums, and traditions, can prove to be a unique and unrepeatable experience, capable of leaving little ones with a lesson they will never be able to find in books or textbooks. So try your hand at a new adventure, even if it means skipping a few days of school. Travel, for example, can be the right opportunity for children to learn about dedication, commitment, love, perseverance, overcoming obstacles, civic pride, patriotism, history, culinary traditions, customs and physical education.
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