How can I lighten my mental load?
A mental condition on the impact of daily problems. Here's why responsibility overload is a source of stress and anxiety
- Management anxiety
- The burden of "mental load"
- Mental load, the health consequences
- Mental load and gender inequality
- Mental load: what escape routes?
Management anxiety
An extremely common mental condition and a source of stress and discomfort. We women know something about it (especially), full of commitments that overwhelm our daily lives. The impression is that of always being in a rush and not being able to get everything done.
Following the children during their activities, remembering deadlines, filling out and mailing those oh-so-important forms. And then the errands, the weekly shopping, the cooking, the cleaning. It all piles up in our heads and we are assailed with the anxiety of not being able to handle it all in the best possible way.
The weight of the "mental load"
It was French sociologist Monique Haicault who first used the term "mental load" in 1984, referring to the invisible burden that comes from juggling life, work and household management responsibilities. A cognitive load that it has always been women's turn to carry on their shoulders and is often related to the phenomenon of the "double day." In fact, we literally live two days in one, juggling multiple responsibilities that we are forced to shoulder and that often result in deleterious effects on personal well-being.
Mental load, the health consequences
Excessive mental load can have major health repercussions: insomnia, chronic fatigue and decreased libido and, in severe cases, anxiety, panic attacks, burnout or depression.
Problems that affect, not surprisingly, women more often. According to the latest WHO World Mental Health Report, as many as 301 million people worldwide have anxiety-related disorders and 208 million suffer from depression. However, these disorders appear to be more prevalent among the female population: 5 percent of women are affected by anxiety and 4.5 percent suffer from depressive disorders, compared with 3 percent of men.
Mental load and gender inequality
Even today, stereotypes and rhetoric view women as the primary janitors of the home and family. This makes us the ones who have to do most of the cognitive and emotional work necessary to ensure the smooth running of daily activities. This is exactly what is referred to as mental load: all the organizational activities related to household and family management.
Even when tasks are divided equally with our partner, they are often not as far as the organizational part is concerned. It is always a woman who, behind the scenes, assigns and coordinates the various activities.
In addition, even those who do not have partners or children are not exempt from the mental load, as responsibilities related to caring for aging parents, emotional relationships with family and friends, and managing administrative deadlines can be sources of anxiety and stress.
All of these factors contribute to women bearing the burden of everyday life and all the responsibilities associated with it. When one also considers the need to be constantly productive, available and high-performing in the workplace, it is not surprising that for many women it is not easy to achieve a balance between the professional and private spheres.
Mental load: what escape routes?
How to loosen the grip and take a breath of fresh air? Dr. Valeria Fiorenza Perris, psychotherapist and Clinical Director of the online psychology service Unobravo, explains.
"The first step to emancipate yourself from this type of anxiety is to recognize it, always listening to your emotions without neglecting them," says the psychotherapist. "Some warning signs are the feeling of guilt of not doing enough and various physical signs (fatigue and sleep- and mood-related disorders).
We then ask for help from those closest to us, learning to delegate and sharing concerns with partners and friends: "Communicating is the golden rule in these uncomfortable situations."
An additional step? "Let's carve out a moment for ourselves," Valeria Perris continues, "doing something we enjoy (a walk, reading a book, a massage, a drink...).
Finally, consulting a therapist to "investigate the causes that led to the psychological overload could be of great help. Then work will be done on how best to manage the stress and to control the causes that cause it."
